Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Mouse War - The collaborators


This morning King Jake rushed to the kitchen to see if he had managed to capture any of the Pohick Mice in the Victor Live Catch Mouse Traps. Alas, there was no such luck. Both traps had been sprung, but neither had entrapped a member of the nefarious gang of mouse hoodlums. As you can imagine, this put King Jake into a very despondent mood. He had placed high hopes in his mouse entrapment technology. What had gone wrong? The mouse catching instructions had been followed to the letter. Trap baited with Peanut Butter. Check. Trap placed in high mouse traffic area. Check. Not a lot of potential failure points. There could only be one other explanation for the failure of the traps to ensnare one of the midnight requisitioning rodents. They had been tipped off. King Jake immediately began rounding up all of the likely mouse sympathizers and collaborators in the Kingdom. These suspects were taken to an undisclosed secure holding facility where they were interogated about their knowledge of mice activities. None of these disloyal mouse lovers has yet confessed to the deed, but there is high likelihood that they will crack soon. There won't be any more Guinea Pig Treats until they do. Don't worry, they have all been treated humanely...errrr... I mean Guinea Pigmanely. They are provided with high quality provisions including, Care Fresh Bedding, Kaytee Timothy Hay, and lots of Fresh Carrots.

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous3:10 AM

    Today on a widely known Mouskada web site allegations of detainee abuse are at an all time high. Allegations of betailing, to ear pulling, mouse in the fur so it does not lay right and the lacing of drugs in carrots to try and make detainees rat on the Pohick mice. This scandal gained international attention. The Grand Pohick forest mouse cleric announced a fatwa against the house of Jake. He is calling for jihad but limited to the perpetrators of the detainee abuse. He pushes for unity and denounces any retaliatory action toward sectarian violence against the Pohick pigs. The house of mouse condemned the actions and is looking at economic sanctions be placed against the Jake family threatening to not honor Disney discounted offers. Saying that ought to teach him. It is obvious that King Jake has failed to evolve his Tactics Techniques and Procedures and the use of his technology to maintain an advantage over his insurgents. Pohick Mice are nocturnal and King Jake is an early to bed and early to raise battle rhythm. He will have to evolve his methods if he hopes to be successful against the insurgent Pohick Mice. His desperation is obvious; he runs risk of destabilization of the entire Pohick Forest and setting the conditions for total chaos.

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